My Blind Experience

I used to work as a cabinet maker during the day and teach math at the community college at night. The guys I worked with at the cabinet shop were mostly Spanish speaking immigrants. Many of them hadn't finished high school and none of them had been to college. A few had been in prison. They didn't think they had the brains to understand college level courses. There's a quick little trick I know to figure out the degree of any angle if you know the lengths of the sides on either side of the angle. Suppose you want to cut a 6" by 8" board diagonally.   What angle would you set your saw to make the cut? The trick is to use inverse tan (length/width), or inverse tan 6/8. Just plug it into the scientific calculator on your smart phone and make sure your calculator is in degrees instead of radians and you'll get the answer: just a kiss under 36.87 degrees. It took me forever to get college students to understand this concept. The immigrant workers in the cabinet sh...

I don't know Braille. I don't plan to learn it. I think today's technology makes Braille obsolete. That's the excuse I give. I'll get to the real reason at the bottom of the page but let's look at the reasons Braille is obsolete first. My phone can read text messages aloud to me. And Reddit. And the newspaper. And any book ever published. And any web site. And any magazine. And any blog, even this one. I can point my phone's camera at a sign in Braille and an app will read the English translation aloud to me. Braille is slower, more cumbersome, and harder to find. Only a few books have been translated into Braille. Even the fastest Braille readers read much slower than people reading words printed on a page. A copy of the Bible in Braille weighs 70 pounds and takes up five feet of bookshelf space. Getting a book in Braille from the library takes weeks. The phone in my pocket wins in every category. There are advantages to knowing Braille. It offers an escape...

Before I went blind I never imagined people who lose their eyesight grieve their loss. It's tough going through it. There are days I feel jealous of people who take driving for granted like I used to. There are days I feel left out when everybody around me laughs at something I didn't see. There are hard days when I'd sell my soul for just a half hour more of decent eyesight so I could fix the broken oil pan cover flapping under my dad's car or get the hot water in the bathroom shower working again. There are really bad days when I suspect I deserve this and wonder which flaw in my character I'm being punished for. It's hard grieving our lost eyesight. I wish that's all we had to deal with, but there's more coming. What did you want to be when you were growing up? The Apollo missions happened when I was a little kid so all my school mates wanted to be astronauts - after we played for the Dallas Cowboys, of course. We had big dreams back then. All kid...

I was diagnosed with retinitus pigmentosa in July 2021. It's a genetic condition that causes the cells in the retina to die. It's incurable and untreatable. I'm legally blind already. Total darkness is coming soon. It's probably the best thing that ever happened to me. When I told the kids I was legally blind and probably two years from being totally blind my son asked me if there was anything I wanted to do while I still could. The first thing I said was Mount Rushmore because my mom is always telling me how cool it is, but I thought about it and realized this isn't my mom's bucket list, it's mine. And I didn't want to go to Mount Rushmore, I wanted to water ski. So two of my kids and I each chipped in a couple grand and we bought a ski boat. I put the grandkids in charge of naming it so it's name is Fuzzy Peach. I'm convinced that's the greatest name for a boat in the whole history of history. We spent half a week on the Tenness...

Of all the wacky myths out there about blind people my favorite is number seven on the Lighthouse's Top 10 Misconceptions about Blind People - "Most blind people are magical or crazy." Total misconception. Magical OR crazy, like we have to pick one. I'm magical AND crazy! Stoopid misconception trying to rob me of my hard earned adjectives! My comfortable tan shoes are next to the bookcase. The grey tennis shoes are to the left of the tan ones. My steel toed boots are in the closet. The shoes I wear to the dance club are to the left of the boots. I wouldn't have known where they were before I went blind. I wouldn't have needed to - I could just look and see where they were. Going blind forced me to get organized. I need to pay attention where I put stuff if I ever want to find it again. I think I surprised my parents on our last road trip by knowing which town we were closest to and which road we were on every step of the way in a place none of us had ever b...

I went blind 30 years into our marriage. My wife has had to make a few changes. I'm going to list them in whatever order they come to me, not necessarily in order of importance. She's had to conquer her fear of driving in heavy traffic She's had to become responsible for the family budget She helped me through the grief and depression while I mourned the loss of my vision and my potential She acts as my sighted guide, holding my left hand while I use my white cane in my right She has to read my mail to me She's had to be strong all the time Perhaps the hardest adjustment she's had to make is being the only breadwinner in the relationship. We're still waiting for an answer from Social Security. There's a level of extra stress that comes from being the only one with a job, a sense of obligation that never, ever lets up. Taking an unpaid day off is suddenly a Very Big Deal. She doesn't even get to feel I've got it easy since I'm not expected to w...

When the eye doctor filled out a certificate of legal blindness for me she asked if I had any questions. Getting asked that felt like the new boss asking if I had any questions five minutes after hiring me. Where am I supposed to park? Where are the bathrooms? What was your name again? Which of my coworkers are cool and which ones should I watch out for? Do I bring a lunch from home? Where's the fridge? The kinds of questions the boss expects me to ask - work related questions - haven't crossed my mind yet. They won't until the next day, or maybe even the next week, after I've tried the work. Yeah, I have questions. A million questions. But I'm so new at this blind thing I don't even know what they are yet. The first thought that came to mind was Now that I'm not allowed to drive anymore how the hell am I supposed to get my car home from this clinic? My second thought was I need to learn Braille and get a guide dog and a white cane and dark glasses, fast! Th...

This first part is a response to a question from a Redditor on r/Blind. I've lightly edited it (I know, right?) to conceal details of the Redditor's specific visual limitations. -------------- If the loss of your vision is progressive it's very hard to know when you've reached the point of being blind enough to claim it. When the change is so gradual you don't notice it happening it seems phony to say "Yesterday I wasn't blind but today I am." It feels even more opportunistic to claim it when there's something in it for you. Everyone who's ever gone blind gradually has been there. You're not alone. You're an honest person - otherwise this wouldn't be bothering you. You want to keep it real about your vision. That's understandable. And you don't want a hand out meant for someone really blind. That's good. I respect that. It feels wrong to pick and choose when to claim you're blind based on what you can get f...

If this was an AA meeting I’d feel comfortable saying “Hi, my name is Layne and I’m blind,” then I’d pause for a moment to let the other attendees say “Hi, Layne.” That’s what’s expected at AA. But this isn’t AA, and just starting with my name and the fact that I’m blind feels inadequate. I told Rumster I write best when I know nobody else will ever read it. No writer’s block, no expectations or pressure on me to dazzle the audience with my wisdom — or, more accurately, the noise floating around my head I mistake as wisdom. But I haven’t got anything better to open with so here it goes: Hi, my name is Layne and I’m blind. That really feels weak. I’d honestly skip the rest of the page if I was reading it, but I can’t because I’m writing it. And saying it feels weak also feels weak, like I’m making excuses for not blowing readers away with an opening line capable of hooking Stephen King. But I’m not going to dwell on it, I’m just going to hop right in. First, let’s get some things establ...